The 5 Stages of Durham

I just found this!  I wrote this post a little over a year ago, and saved it as draft but never published it.  Figured better late than never.  Here's another dose of my fight with moving to Durham and learning to love it.

Written on 9.20.11:
When I moved in with Justin in January of 2010, I thought Durham was the most amazing place to live, ever.  And in all honesty, it had nothing to do with Durham.  Every bit of it had to do with my love for Justin.  If Justin had gotten a job and moved to Canada, or Timbuktu, I would have thought those were great places to live, too.  But as it turns out, he got a job at Duke and moved to Durham.  January of that year was a very exciting time in my life.  I think it was the second time I have felt that sure about myself.  (The first was graduating from junior college in 2007.)

As of January in 2010 (almost two years ago, wow!), I had just graduated college with a bachelors degree, had gotten engaged and was planning my dream wedding, had just returned from a wedding festival where I won a free honeymoon, and was preparing to move in with the love of my life, away from my parents.  Life seemed so simple, and so easy to do then.  Graduating college?  Check.  Getting married?  Working on it.  Becoming a housewife?  Close!  I mean, I pretty much had no worries.  My student loans wouldn't come into effect for another 6 months, and I was absolutely certain that I would have a job by then.  It seriously didn't even cross my mind that I couldn't get a job, or that it would be difficult.  I wasn't even thinking of applying to work anywhere, because I was taking the first few months "off" from working.  That's how confident I was.

Stuff got hard.

I moved in with Justin, and that was fine.  As can be expected, no matter how long you've been together, when you decide to move in with someone, you learn things about them that maybe you didn't know or didn't want to know, and vice-versa.  We had fights, and there were nights where I cried and wanted nothing more than to move back in with my mom.  But eventually, that feeling passed and our life together began to get a routine.  Because I wasn't working, and because we only had one car, I drove Justin to work every morning, and hung out in the apartment alone.  The furthest I ever went was the grocery store (which I walked to), and to pick Justin up from work.  Then I made dinner, he played WoW and I watched TV (we had satellite then) or surfed the Web.  I usually fell asleep first, on the couch (still do), and when he got tired, he would wake me up and walk me to the bed where we would then go to sleep.  Rinse, repeat.

As those first few months went on, however, I began to develop a very serious, though somewhat minor, depression.  I sat in the apartment all day, watching movies or TV, and talked to my mom on the phone as often as possible, because she worked a day job then, too.  I missed the hell out of my mom, and it upset me that I lived so far away.  I know I could have lived further than 4 hours away, but this was (and is) the farthest I've ever lived from home, and it was hitting me pretty hard.  I missed Spartanburg.  I missed knowing where everything was, and my friends, and the places to eat and the movie theater.  I began longing for Spartanburg.  Durham was suddenly horrible.  It was the worst place on Earth to be, and I couldn't stand it.  I blamed Durham for taking me away from my family and my friends, and things I was familiar with.

The apartment Justin and I lived in suddenly became a drastically different picture than the sunshine-y, bright, loving place it had been when I moved into it.  Our kitchen, and accordingly the other rooms sometimes, had roaches in it.  Bad.  They were everywhere.  They scaled the walls and the floor.  It was absolutely, and on all accounts, disgusting.  We had the apartment sprayed several times, and we even learned that the bug issue had taken over our entire building, so they had to evacuate the building for a day to fumigate it.  Nothing worked.  As pop culture will tell you, those damn things will survive the apocalypse.  This is what depressed me more than anything else, knowing that we were forced to live in a place where the most disgusting creatures on Earth crawled on everything we owned.  I can remember sitting on the couch, staring at the kitchen from the living room and being incredibly petrified to walk in there because I might see one.  I avoided the kitchen as much as possible.  I could just see the episode of Twilight Zone where the man with the roach phobia gets eaten alive by them as they come out of the walls come true in my living room.

I became a recluse, and refused to leave the apartment for any reason other than to go to the grocery store or take and pick up Justin from work.  I kept the blinds closed and became frightened of our ghetto neighborhood.  (When Justin moved in, unbeknownst to him, there was bullet hole in the window of the bedroom.)  Realizing how bad the neighborhood we now had to live in for the next 6 months was, I became even more of a recluse because it scared me to go out into the community of odd and scary people.

And so that was my life from February to June of 2010.  I don't guess that's a terribly long time to be depressed, but having never been depressed, it was long for me.  After June, we moved out of the hellhole apartment and into the much nicer and cleaner and better upgrade of an apartment that we currently live in.  But even after the move, I still didn't like Durham.  I sat in the new apartment, same as before, watching movies or TV, and not doing anything.  Not being able to find work really weighed on me as well because I felt like I wasn't contributing.

Durham became my go-to for resting blame on.  Everything bad that happened was because we lived in Durham.

Then came July of 2011.

My mother came to visit us for a week, and while she was here, she and I rode around the downtown area a lot, a part of Durham I didn't have a lot of experience with.  That week really opened my eyes to Durham, and helped me see things I could love about it.

Downtown Durham changed everything.  I had a can't-beat-'em-join-'em epiphany.

Durham doesn't necessarily rule over Spartanburg, but now I can call both places home and feel all right about it.

I feel like I've gone through the Kübler-Ross equivalent of Durham.

• Denial.  It's not so bad living here, it could be worse!
• Anger.  Dammit, Durham, you suck!  I want to go home!
• Bargaining.  Okay, if I can go home every two weeks, maybe I can stand Durham more.  Small doses.
• Depression.  I wish I didn't have to live here.  I'd rather live anywhere but here.
• Acceptance.  Well, this isn't so bad.  I can love both home towns equally.

---

Written 10.30.12:
Looking back on all this, it makes me so sad to think back on those few months I was so depressed.
  Even now, I'll admit I don't really get out as much as I should, but I'm in no way as much of a hermit as I was then.  I'm no longer afraid.  I get out in the morning or afternoons and run now.  Justin and I go on adventures together to see the little spots of Durham we haven't seen yet.  I've accepted this town as where I live; it's not weird anymore to put 27705 as my zip code and not 29301.  I've almost completely acclimated.  Some things about Durham still give me the creeps, though.  The homeless population here is the worst I've ever seen.  They're also pushy!  The parts of Durham (and Raleigh, for that matter) that are ghetto, are really ghetto.  They're scary.  I also still miss Spartanburg like crazy sometimes.  I get excited to go home and visit my friends and see the familiar places that made up home for me for 23 years.  But I like coming back to Durham now, too.  Durham is the familiar place for me now.  It's so weird the turn my hatred for Durham has taken over the last two (almost three!) years.  And all it took was that one weekend from my mother to change everything.  But then again, she always fixes everything. :)

The Quickest Movie Recap Ever.

Instead of a detailed synopsis of the rest of the Halloween Extravaganza Movies, here's the shortest description I can give for each of the remaining ones (except for Nightmare Before Christmas, that's happening tomorrow).

15. Cry_Wolf

This movie still uses AIM and ski masks.  There's a Halloween party and a twist ending.  Also, Bon Jovi.

16. Urban Legend

Fueled my love for urban legends.  Killer uses urban legends to kill their victims.  All the good ones are represented.

17. Urban Legend 2: Final Cut

Sequel to the first one.  Features one actor from the first one.  Same MO, much lamer ending than the first.

18. Urban Legend: Bloody Mary

Not even remotely in the same vein as the first two.  Totally different story.  Pretty lame.

19. Hard Candy

GREAT psychological thriller.  Somewhat twist ending.  Girl power.

20. When A Stranger Calls (2006)

Don't answer the damn phone.  Also, do more cardio.

21. The Silence of the Lambs

Classic.  Meet Hannibal Lecter.  Rethink Leland Stottlemeyer.

22. Hannibal

Ol' Hannibal's at it again.  More bowels and a new Starling.

23. The Number 23

23 suddenly applies to everything and effs shit up.  Happy accident that this is #23 on the list.

24. Secret Window

Don't cheat on your hubby.  You will make for great succotash.

25. Scream

Ghostface.  Hot boyfriend.  Great twist ending.

26. Scream 2

More Ghostface.  Check behind the shower curtain.

27. Scream 3

Even more Ghostface.  Also, a movie within a movie.

28. Scre4m

More screams, more parodies.

29. The Rocky Horror Picture Show

Another classic.  Men loving men and musical numbers.  I miss the '70s.

30. Shutter Island

Teddy is Teddy.  Or is he?  Mind-blowing.

On Getting A Tattoo

I've been tinkering with the idea for a while about whether or not to get a tattoo.  Several friends have them, and I always find them fascinating.  My mom is of course really freaked out by the idea of a tattoo, since they are permanent.  But I know better than to get, say, Justin's name on my skin, or something like that.  Even though I have absolute and total faith that we are going to be together til the end of time, I still wouldn't chance it.  I'm superstitious, a realist, and paranoid.  All those things work in my favor when deciding on a tattoo.  So far, I've found 3 that really rocked my socks at the idea of having them inked on me forever.

1. A Sparrow.

I wanted a sparrow for the longest time for three reasons: Good Charlotte, Jack Sparrow, and "His Eye is on the Sparrow."  For me, the sparrow symbolized music that made me happy, a story that made me happy, and my faith.  Those things all meant a lot to me, and having them on my arm as a daily reminder really enticed me.  Since around August of this year, the sparrow idea was dropped in favor of #2.

2. A Bare Tree with the Roots Showing.

I know the tree here isn't bare, but the roots are perfect.

Autumn means many things to me.  It means love: I fell in love with Justin during fall of 2003.  We got married November 14, 2010.  Autumn means change.  All the leaves falling, and the temperature falling.  It's a magical time for me.  No other time of year compares to it.  For me, a tattoo of a fall tree with the roots showing says, "Remember your roots, but remember to grow."  It's perfect.  The leaves have the opportunity to grow back, to be reborn, but the tree is forever rooted in that exact same place.  I think it's quite lovely.

3. Walk By Faith on My Foot.

I found this picture on Pinterest (all of the pictures featured in this post link to my tattoo board), and cried when I saw it.  That particular Bible verse (2 Cor. 5:7) is sacred to me.  The first time I saw it was in Hobby Lobby on a wooden sign.  Afterward, I found it in my Bible, and have been in love with it since.  How swelled with love I get when I think of the meaning...it goes back to "lean not on your own understanding," but this verse is much more poetic.  Faith will guide you.  I lean more toward the idea of fate rather than choice, and so this verse works for that, too.  Having that verse on my foot is just genius in my opinion.

I have a few specific requirements for getting a tattoo:

• It can't be somewhere that I would need to have major surgery (like over the kidneys like a tramp stamp, or on top of my ovaries/hip bones).
• I have to be able to cover it up easily.
• It has to have significant meaning in my life, and I have to understand and be willing to remember that this is permanent.  So, Bieber lyrics are out.

My original placement plan for the first two was on my left forearm, just above the bend of my elbow.  That way, it fit all the above requirements, and I would be able to better moisturize it with my right, dominant hand.  But the idea of having the tattoo on my foot covers the requirements even more rigidly, and I could still moisturize it with ease.  I've heard from multiple people with wrist tattoos that they hurt like hell, so I dismissed that idea pretty quickly.  Plus, a wrist tattoo is pretty hard to cover up.  I have enough "padding" on my forearm that I feel confident it could protect against the pain for the most part.  And I know my foot would hurt, but now, thinking of putting that specific Bible verse anywhere but my foot doesn't seem right.

Because I feel like the sparrow idea (or at least the reasons I made for it) are much more whimsical and not very deeply meaningful to me, I have put that idea on the back burner.  If I do indeed go through with a tattoo (which has recently become an option for weight loss incentive), it will more than likely be either #2 or #3.  I'm really itching to get one, and may even do so this year, but the realistic side of me sees this happening next year sometime.

I will surely keep you posted. :)

Color Me Rad: The Aftermath, aka What I Didn't Know

I will post a detailed account of my awesome Color Me Rad experience later today or tomorrow, but here is the Aftermath first.

I ran in the Color Me Rad 5K this past Saturday in Raleigh.  This was the first race I'd ever run in, and there were already lots of things I didn't know.  But in addition, there were things that I thought future runners in this particular race might want to know before they take the colorful plunge.

The online and in-person registration process was very straight-forward and probably doesn't need to be explained.  So, let's just get to the CMR race-specific stuff.

• The shirt.  You receive an official CMR T-shirt when you participate in this race.  When you register online, you are given the option to choose sizes for the shirt.  If you choose women's sizes, the shirt will have a V-neck.  If this bothers you, order a men's shirt or a unisex shirt instead.

Not the shirt that comes with registration; this one is available in the CMR shop.

• A note about the Color Bombs.  Color Bombs are not free.  As you may or may not know, the major selling point that differentiates this race from other 5Ks is the colored corn starch that is thrown on you as you run.  That's all you know going in, is that you have colored powder thrown on you while you run 3 miles.  This isn't necessarily true.  I had imagined this setup where every person who walks through the door gets a Color Bomb (the packets of cornstarch), and they can throw them at their own leisure as there are people lined up along the race course.  The pictures I had seen never depicted otherwise, nor did any other write-ups of this race that I had read.  Here's how the whole color part works: No one is given Color Bombs upfront.  The only way you can get Color Bombs prior to the actual race is to purchase them.  They run for $3 each or 4 for $10.  As you run the course, there are 5 color stations (not sure if there's always 5 in every race, but there was in this one) where volunteers douse you with either cornstarch like the regular Color Bombs, or liquid color through sprayers.  This is how most people get their first dose of color.  As you go through each of the color stations and finally reach the end, you are handed your own Color Bomb (singular) as you cross the Finish Line.  These are generally saved for the big color explosion that happens every 5 minutes, where the runner gather in a huge group and throw the color in the air.  We of course used mine to its full potential on just me and didn't bother with the color explosion.  So, short and sweet answer, you only get one Color Bomb.  The part where you get color thrown at you as you run is only pertinent to the color stations, unless you purchase additional Color Bombs prior to the race and have someone else color you rad separately from the race.

Taken from here.

• Your skin gets a big helping of color, too.  I figured that since I had obviously had on a white shirt and that you could pull up my sleeves and see my still-colorless arms after my family pelted me with Color Bombs, that my skin under the shirt was also colorless.  Never been more wrong.  You might could wear thicker layers to help this point if your race falls on a cold morning, but you will be running, so keep that in mind.  I only realized this 8 Color Bombs, 5 color stations, and the Finish Line Color Bomb later, once we were already home and all begging for the shower.  I stood in the shower and undressed, to avoid spilling any loose powder still on the shirt in the floor of the bathroom.  When I finally peeled off my shirt, my skin was an identical match to it!  I couldn't believe it, my skin almost looked painted!  (Please note, if you run this race in the future, and don't have an enthusiastic family who pelts you with color beforehand on top of the color from the color stations, your case may not be as bad as mine was.  But to those who are running alongside an enthusiastic posse, be warned!)  Also, the liquid color that was mentioned in the last bullet will most definitely stain your skin, no question.  In my excitement, whenever I passed a color station, I would stand with my arms up and turn in a circle, to get color wherever I could.  This led to the green liquid color going into the armholes of my shirt, which resulted in my still-green armpits.  No lie, that was the only color I just could NOT get rid of in my shower.  Here's your best chance for color survival: If you get any liquid color on you, try and aim for your front.  If you get the liquid color on your back, you will need a good friend in the shower with you to scrub it off!  Once you are through with the race and have colored yourself rad as much as you want to, jump.  Like, jump-up-jump-up-to-get-down kind of jumping.  Get as much loose powder off of you as you can.  Have someone beat you like a rug if you wish.  Once you are in the shower in hopes of seeing a rainbow going down the drain at your feet, use a wash cloth!  I had hopes, that even though my skin was a tie-dye mess, that maybe it was just powder residue and would come off with water alone.  Wrong!  Once I finally asked for a wash cloth, it helped tremendously.  If you already use a wash cloth as part of your shower regimen, good for you.  I don't, I use a loofa, so it didn't automatically occur to me to use one.

Also from here.

• Your hair will feel like straw.  Your hair is the next most popular place for color to go aside from your white shirt.  If you're a male runner with short hair, or a female runner with super short hair, this bullet won't be nearly as bad for you.  If you have hair around shoulder length like mine, or longer, you're in for a treat.  The liquid color won't get your hair nearly as bad as your skin, although it will stain your scalp.  Again, bend over and head bang.  Shake out as much loose powder as you can.  Run your fingers through your hair to help the powder stuck on your scalp to get loose or fall out.  Once you are in the shower, you'll want to wash your hair (along with your face, etc) more than once.  The first time, you will see lots of color falling down your legs and down the drain.  The second time, you may not see any, but wash it at least a second time anyway.  It'll help your hair to not feel so scarecrow-y.  The CMR site also recommends using leave-in conditioner for this same reason.

Taken from here.

• Bring some kind of seat/phone/camera cover.  It may not be a first thought so close to race day, but remember that this colored powder gets on everything.  If you plan to run with an mp3 player or phone, or even if you're just a bystander with one, put it in a baggie and seal it up!  Same goes for any cameras.  Tell anyone coming to cheer you on this same thing.  Everyone who came to see me on Saturday left with color on their phones, cameras, clothes, and hair, just like me.  Also remember to cover your car seat(s) with something; a blanket, towels, cellophane, whatever you want to use.

This, too, is from here.

I think that's all the Aftermath stuff I wanted to mention.  If this list comes across as cynical, I'm very sorry for that.  This was such a fun race to participate in, and I feel like any other races I run will only shimmer in comparison to the shine of Color Me Rad.  I would definitely recommend it; it's a once-in-a-lifetime experience, to be sure.  These are just the things that nobody told me, and I wanted to make sure they were printed somewhere for someone to find who might want to know them!  If there's anything else you'd like to know, here is CMR's official FAQ page.  You can also feel free to leave a comment below and I'll be glad to answer any additional questions you have here as well.

Caty Waterfield and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

If you have never read this book, you should.  It's cute.

I had the worst day yesterday.  And I don't know why.

I'm guessing it was hormones and a little stress.  This is Lady Week for me (my absolute least favorite week of any month), and I'm guessing that had a lot to do with it.

I'm also really stressed out about the race this Saturday.  I cannot believe it is this Saturday!  It's always so unreal to me when what was once a date becomes an actual day.  I feel unprepared in the understandable sense that I've never done this before.  I don't know what I'm supposed to do or what the protocol for anything is.  I didn't think I'd get to this age, aside from the whole children vantage point, where I'd still have to deal with firsts.  It scares the hell out of me.  My entire family (which is 4 people, you understand) is coming up for this, and I really don't want them to come all this way to watch me fail epically.  They would never feel that way, of course, but I would.  I'm awful hard on myself.

I guess there's a first time for everything.  I'd also like to think that since this race is such a big affair, they'd expect people who'd never raced before, and accommodate.  Here's hoping!

Yesterday, I showed really classic signs of depression.  I had zero energy, no appetite, I was really tired, and I didn't really care about anything.  I sat in my rocker, feeling sad and looking out the window.  I didn't do dishes or laundry.  I wasn't in any physical pain, and I almost didn't feel anything at all.  After I ate dinner, I fell asleep on the couch for several hours and then Justin woke me up to go to bed.  It was quite scary as I usually don't feel like that, and I'm glad that's over!

On a happier note, check this out!

This is what I saw in the mirror at work today.  (Oh, and by the way, this is the only bathroom mirror we have in the building.  It is propped up against the wall between the men's and women's rooms.  The individual bathrooms do not have mirrors in them.  Just how to they expect me to know if I'm about to wreck myself if I can't check myself??)

Anyway, I really like my silhouette here.  I was very pleasantly surprised. :)  In related news, I've lost 7 pounds as of this morning!  That was a nice surprise, too.  That's almost two bags of sugar!  It's the little things...

Halloween Movie #13: Prom Night

(I skipped this one in the last list, so I'm making it its own post.)

Prom Night is a remake of an '80 Jamie Lee Curtis movie of the same name.

The plot features high school senior Donna Keppel, who witnesses the death of her family at the hand of her science teacher, who is obsessed with her.  Fast forward a few years later, and she is preparing for her prom.  The teacher has been in prison since the murders, but escapes several days before the prom.  (How he knows the date of the prom or where Donna now goes to school is unknown.)  As Donna and two other girlfriends are getting their hair done, taking pictures with their dates, and arriving to the prom in a limo, the teacher is on his way to the hotel housing the prom, coming after Donna.  The group of 6 friends rents a room at the swanky hotel and make several trips to and from the room during the night.  The teacher finds out what floor they are staying on and wreaks havoc by killing off lots of people, including the housekeeper, and the other two girls.  The police finally notify Donna's aunt and uncle about the teacher and how Donna is in danger.  The police crash the prom and evacuate the hotel, but the teacher sneaks out unnoticed in a concierge uniform.  After killing nearly anyone else who stands in his way, including the police officer guarding the house Donna is in, the teacher gets into the house and finally has Donna in his clutches.  Donna is saved by a very dramatic, last-minute gunshot by the commanding officer for the police department.  Afterward, Donna presumably goes on to live a somewhat normal life and also presumably never wears a corseted dress again.

Even though this is a straight-out remake of the original Prom Night, I've never seen the original.  From what I understand, like most remakes, this remake is a pitiful representation of the original.  On IMDb, for example, the original has a 5.2/10 rating, while the remake has a 3.7/10 rating.  Neither rating is really spectacular, but the original still has a higher one.

I'm not sure how I'd rate this movie on my own accord.  It's a really straight-forward teen "thriller" with a little sex, a little jumpiness, and a decent soundtrack.  I apparently liked it enough to purchase/request it back in '08, so I feel like that says something about it.  Watching it the other day, however, I see why it may have such a low rating/fan following.  It's not campy or anything, it's just sort of weak.  IMDb lists a genre of this movie as mystery, even though there is no mystery to the movie past the first 20 minutes.  We know who the killer is, and why he's trying to get to Donna.  In addition, every cliche is used in this movie, from the token blacks getting 86'd to the main character forgoing their meds to the bad teen acting that's trying to seem "real."  It's all there.  I think that makes it entertaining, but it doesn't make it a good movie, by any means.

If I had to rate it, I'd probably give the movie something like a 4/10.  Definitely not a stellar movie, but good enough for background housecleaning noise.  I don't think you'll be scared to go to your prom after seeing it, though.

Truer Words

I saw this on Pinterest today and thought it really deserved a post.

Reeling Some In: Halloween Movies 8-12

WOW!  I'm really sorry it's been so long since my last post!  I didn't realize it had been quite that long...sometimes blogging takes a backseat to life, though.  Just the way it is...

Anyway, let's catch up on some more Halloween Movie Extravaganza movies!  I've had the hardest time keeping up with these movies on the schedule I wanted, because Justin and I went home two weekends ago and left on Thursday for the weekend.  Not watching Thursday's movie, and then not watching the 4 following movies over that weekend really put me behind and then I had other stuff to do, and it just got lost from me.  I'm sorry about that!  I'm gonna try to catch up with what little time in October we have left (!) and get these watched and written about!

Here we go.

NES 7.  After the final installment of the storyline regarding Freddy Kruger, we have an out-of-body experience of sorts to continue the name.  In this movie, Wes Craven introduces the storyline he would later use for the Scream series, a movie within a movie.  This time, all the actors from the previous 6 films acknowledge that the past 6 movies were actually movies and that they are actually actors.  It's pretty surreal to say the least.  Wes also introduces a new thought process to the storyline of Freddy.  Wes suggests that there is an evil spirit which inhabited Freddy Kruger and that Fred was never really a bad guy, just possessed by evil.  The evil spirit, now free since the Kruger movies are done and not claiming Kruger as its personal resident anymore, is now haunting our heroine from the first movie, Nancy, in real life.  Nancy must defeat the evil spirit to put the real nightmare to rest for good.  And of course, she does.

NES 8.  The final movie for both respective series, this is Freddy vs. Jason.  Since Freddy is for real dead, he enlists the help of Jason Voorhees from Friday the 13th franchise to help him continue his killings.  Jason is supposed to work as a catalyst to scare the people of Elm Street, since Freddy feeds off their fear.  But after Freddy is successfully brought back, he and Jason go up against each other to rack up the most slaughter points.

Saw.  Definitely one of my favorite horror movies.  This is the story of the Jigsaw killer.  After being diagnosed with terminal cancer, John tries to end his own life.  When the suicide attempt fails, he has a new outlook on life: thankfulness.  When John realizes that he is dying but thankful for life, while others are perfectly healthy and take life for granted, he decides to teach them a lesson, one by one.  He snatches his victims up, sedates them, and puts them into terrifying death traps.  When they wake up, they are played a tape with instructions in the tape for how to survive.  Most people don't survive since panic sets in and the traps are usually set on a timer of a minute or less.  But those that do survive are thankful for their life now, in John's eyes, now that they have realized how quickly it can be taken away.  The traps are always relevant to how the victim in question is wasting their life.  With a great plot, and a brilliant twist-ending, Saw is definitely a Halloween staple.

Saw II.  (Don't worry, this is the only sequel of this series I own!)  The Jigsaw killer is at it again, targeting a policeman by kidnapping his son.  This time, all the victims are captured simultaneously and put into a large decrepit house together.  They have to find out what they all have in common, and find a way to survive before the airborne poison that is killing them all sets in.  Another twist-ending makes this a worthy sequel, and I don't say that very often.

Disturbia.  I've heard this is a remake of Rear Window, but I've never seen that movie.  In this "remake," Kale becomes a distant and emotionally upset teenager after the death of his father, which he feels responsible for.  After punching a teacher in school, Kale is sentenced to house arrest since he is only 6 months away from being 18 and putting him in Juvie would only work for that long.  For the first few days of house arrest, Kale is living the high life.  But after his mom cuts him off from video games and TV, Kale has to find something else to do.  So he turns to spying on his neighbors.  After getting his kicks from watching marital affairs and trouble-making kids around the neighborhood, Kale starts to set his sights on a creepy, quiet neighbor, Robert.  There is a scandal on the news about a serial killer in the area and Kale starts noticing similarities between the news details and his neighbor Robert.  After enlisting the help of his best friend and the hot new girl next door, the trio find out that Robert really is the killer and they must stop him before he kills again.  And this time, he's coming for Kale's mother.  A great story, original in its own right, this is a creepy acknowledgement of the dangers of people-watching.

The $4 Soup

I saw this soup in the grocery store Monday while I was gathering some stuff to make Cheesy Chicken & Rice in the crockpot.  I thought the flavor was interesting, even though I'm not a big seafood person.  I was also very skeptical to pay $4 for a little microwave bowl of soup.  That seemed awful high to me.

You'll notice, it gives "kickin'" and "sweet" as the adjectives of this soup.  Rarely do I come across a food that accomplishes both, but, as I am sitting here eating this right now, I can tell you that this soup definitely delivers.  It's not thick like a stew, but it's not watery like regular soup.  It's good, hearty balance.

I will also say, however, that it's not too low on the calories (460 in the whole cup), so if you're counting, take note!  This soup sort of levels with you there, though, since it's so filling.  You won't have to eat anything in addition, like a sandwich or chips, to accompany this soup.  I'm sitting here now, almost doubled over from being so full!  So if you don't have a problem paying $4 for a 15.5 oz cup of soup and the calorie count isn't your enemy, I'd recommend this soup, especially on cold days like today!

On another food note, I bought another Crockpot yesterday!

Isn't it cute?  I love the owls and how it's brown and orange (my wedding colors).

It's also little!  Here it is on my kitchen counter.

It's shorter than my middle canister!  Hehe.  That's nice, though.  I'm going to enjoy having a crockpot that size for meals like meatball subs, where it's way too small of a meal for the big Crockpot, but too big for the tiny Little Dipper crockpot.  I can't wait to use it!  I was going to put the aforementioned Cheesy Chicken & Rice in it yesterday, but felt like it wouldn't hold it.  That ended up going in my Grandma J crockpot, the same one I use for chili.  So now the crockpot count is up to 4.  Justin had a small fit, claiming we had nowhere to put it.

Ha!  Like I care about that!

31 Days: Photos 4-8

Pretty sure I mentioned in my last post that I'm not very good at blogging over the weekends, right?

Making up for lost time!

#4

The lovely clouds on Friday.

#5

The cookie's fortune.

#6

A fantastic knotted branch with a bokeh background.  Really love this shot.

#7

This little thing is Leila Ann, one of my best friends' daughter.  She was only a month and a half old here!

#8

But two weeks ago, she turned 1!  I got to take those pictures, too. :)

Halloween Movie #4, 5, and 6

Did I mention I'm also pretty bad at writing on the weekends?

Now to catch up (and there will be another movie post later tonight for the up-to-speed movie).

This writeup is about NES movies 4, 5, and 6.

#4 is titled, The Dream Master.  Our heroine from #3, Kristen (who is now played by a different actress than the Medium lady), is out of the nuthouse and has new friends.  One of the new friends is a girl named Alice.  Alice believes in an old nursery rhyme about the Dream Master, a person who guards to gate the the dream world.  Alice believes that Kruger has somehow breached this gate, and that if they can shut the gate on Freddy, he can't haunt their dreams anymore.  After an hour and a half that I just don't remember, this plan succeeds, and we're left with another cliff hanger.

In #5, The Dream Child, Alice returns and is graduating high school with her friends.  For several months, Alice hasn't encountered Freddy and is still satisfied with having beaten him in the dream world.  Meanwhile, Freddy has been born again as he brings his mother's spirit back from the dead and makes her relive his birth.  The night of her graduation, Freddy returns and begins to wreak havoc by killing all her friends.  He also kills her boyfriend, Dan (by becoming the Freddy Bike - that was pretty epic).  Alice is freaked out because Freddy is coming after her and killing her friends while she is awake.  This is because Freddy has actually melted himself into Alice to carry out his killings from inside her.  After Dan is killed, Alice is hospitalized for acting crazy and we find out she's pregnant.  She meets her future child, a boy named Jacob, in her dreams and she learns that Freddy is trying to convert Jacob while still inside Alice to be like him and murder people so that Jacob will carry on his work.  Alice and Jacob work together to defeat Freddy through trickery, while Freddy's mother, Amanda, sucks him back into her womb and the movie ends with her trying to contain the famous hand claw pertruding from her belly.  Alice and baby end fine.

The sixth installment, and final movie of the original run, is Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare.  We are given an infographic at the beginning at told that ten years from "now" (trivia on IMDb says it's supposed to mean 1999 since the movie came out in 1991), every child and teenager has been killed and parents are stricken with grief and crazy.  Next, we see a kid on an airplane, supposedly the last remaining teenager in existence at this point, experiencing lots of turbulence.  Freddy shows himself and hurls the kid back into "our time" without any memories of what's happened so he can't warn anyone about the future.  The kid stumbles onto a shelter for runaways and psychologically-impaired kids.  One of the psychologists, Maggie, has been having weird reoccurring dreams that she can't explain.  They involve a little girl with red ribbons in her hair in an abandoned house.  When airplane kid reveals he's having the same dreams, things start to come together for Maggie.  After attempting to kill off the other characters, Maggie finally goes head-to-head with Freddy.  She is the only one who can kill him, because SPOILER ALERT, Maggie is Freddy's daughter.  To complete Freddy's back story, we learn he was married with a daughter, but his wife stumbled upon the cellar where he killed the children and Freddy killed her to keep her quiet.  Freddy grew up to be a monster because he was ridiculed as a child himself for being weird and for being a rape baby.  Maggie as a child witnesses Freddy killing her mother, and tells someone (we don't know who).  After the murder of Maggie's mother is looked into, the child killing are of course discovered and the rest is history.  Maggie kills Freddy with his own claw glove, and the movie ends with this great montage of all his past killings.

The 6th movie was pretty good, and the scene with Freddy being Maggie's dad was really weird because he wasn't wearing his makeup.  I liked the ending, though.

Speaking of makeup, the job in #5 looked awful.  You could really tell is was fake.  The other movies did a pretty good job of the makeup.  Freddy also apparently lost his famous dirty hat after #3.  And the opening for #5 was batshit crazy.  I'm not sure I even really know what happened.

Crazy times, the '80s were.  Man.

A Pissed Off Rant.

I just came across something on Pinterest that made me really angry.

If you are a woman who has a Pinterest account (seriously, who doesn't?), you've probably seen pins with this same general idea..."# of things you can do for your husband," or "how to show your husband that you care."  I never really had a problem with these things, because I do want to show my husband that I care and I do want to do things for him to make him feel special.

However, I came upon this blog post tonight and it really boiled my blood.  It is titled, "25 Ways to Communicate Respect (to Your Husband)."  I took a look at it, thinking it was another little list of nice things to do in favor of your man that I could take a few notes from.

But in reality, it's just a chauvinistic list of ways women can feel less empowered and more possessed by their men.

I think that #2, which reads, "Honor His Wishes: Give weight to what your husband thinks is important. Make those things a priority that matter most to him, whether it’s having dinner ready when he gets home from work or keeping the house tidy or limiting computer time. Don’t make him ask twice. (Philippians 2:4)," is what really pissed me off the most.  Don't make him ask twice?  He's not my parent, lady, he's supposed to be my partner!  Oh, and by the way, please get a better Bible, because I looked up that verse in my own Bible, and it simply says to pay attention to other people's interests in addition to our own.  It doesn't say to cower to your husband (moreover, it is in relation to how Jesus wants us to act toward one another, not a one-way street).

What is this, 1952?  The author of this post clearly thinks so.  It says in black and white (according to her) that I as a wife should do whatever my husband asks of me, without the burden of him having to ask more than once.  Almost as if I should be honored he even asked me to do it once.  I am not his slave, his housekeeper, or his mother.  I am his wife.  He respects me and I respect him.  Know what's not respectful?  Treating your wife like a slave, a housekeeper, or an employee.

And what about the husbands?  It's okay for me to have to ask him more than once to pick up his dirty clothes (that I wash), or bring his dirty dishes to the sink (where I have to clean them)?  But I better not take one damn thing he says for granted or just flat-out not obey him, lest the Lord smite me?  What the hell!  Why is it that wives always get the boot where respect is concerned?  Why are wives always expected to respect and bow down to their husbands (according to the women who pin these things), but husbands are never expected to show respect to their women?  It's almost like it's the norm for women to poke around their homes in pre-pumpkin Cinderella garb and have lit-up faces at the idea of their husbands being satisfied at their work.  It makes me sick.

Yes, in case you haven't figured it out, I am a a feminist.  But if you want the truth, I'm more of an egalitarian.  I believe that men and women should operate on totally equal ground.  If a woman wants to be a mechanic, and a man wants to be a ballerina, there should be no problem with this.  Despite my current state as homemaker, I am not a big fan of gender roles.  To be more specific, I am the smallest increment a fan can be of the expectation of gender roles, which is what we have here.  Women are expected to cater to their husbands without expecting anything in return.  This is bullshit.  Men should offer respect right back!

As I said earlier, Justin is my partner.  We work together to form this life we live.  He does not own me simply because I am married to him.  Nor do I own him.  Not only is he lucky to have me, we are lucky to have each other.  I thank God for him everyday.  This absolutely does not mean that I am suddenly responsible for making sure he his happy.  I am solely responsible for making myself happy, and if doing things for Justin makes me happy, then that's one thing.  But being expected to always want to do things for him is being a slave.  Likewise, Justin isn't responsible for making me happy, either.  But he wants to.  And I want to make him happy back.  Because I love him.  Not because I'm afraid he'll have to ask twice for me to get something done, or because I cower to him.  We both said vows at our wedding, not just me.  I feel like the blogging/pinning community really forgets or understates that sometimes.

And how dare you bring Bible verses into this!  God never said that men should be the owners of the household, he said that we should love one another - that our joy may be full.  Not the husband's joy, our joy.  This isn't that hard of a concept.  Mutual respect and mutual love.  Marriage is many things, but a one-way street it is not.  That's 101, the first thing you learn in a marriage.  You both have to give, or the weaker side will crumble and the foundation will follow.  I just can't believe so many women feel this way.  The former pinner of this post even said that "every women should read this and start putting these ideas into motion!"  Ugh, disgusting!

Do take note: I am in no way, shape, or form saying that husbands should not be respected.  I am saying, with every fiber of my being, that that respect should be shared mutually between the couple.  I feel like women are already shut down enough through gender roles, and this just enables stereotypes and unfair expectations.

In closing, ladies, please.  Get a grip.  In the words of Sebastian the Crab, "Jeez, mon."

Halloween Movie #4: NES 3

As a continuation of our last movie update, today's post is about Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors.  Same story, different movie: Freddy Kruger is targeting the children of the mob that burnt him alive and is coming to them through their dreams.  If you die in the dream, you die in real life.

So far, I've got to say, this is my favorite one.  I really liked a lot of things about this movie in relation to the first two.

• In the original, it's mentioned that Freddy is a shape-shifter, although the idea of him morphing into something else to fool his victim isn't really showcased until this installment.
• I like the casting for this, specifically the two actors that went on to do other things, like Laurence Fishburne (Morpheus from the Matrix trilogy), who's listed as Larry in this movie, and Patricia Arquette (of Medium fame), the main character.
• It took Freddy three movies to reach his well-known snarky attitude and one-liners, but now that he's there I hope he doesn't relapse.
• I liked that Wes Craven actually had something to do with this one - you could tell.
• More of Freddy's story is revealed, and it actually makes sense and flows well with the story we already know.  I hope we find out more about him in the coming movies.

Side Note: when I was a kid, I saw a snippet of this movie on TV one year near Halloween.  I never knew what movie it was, but it scared me to death.  I saw the scene where the girl gets her head smashed into the TV and dies there.  Several years later, I looked up that scene online to find out what movie it was from, and I found out it was from NES 3.  Watching it again today, it was still a little scary just because of the impact it had on me as a kid.

I guess third time really is a charm, because this is the best NES yet.  I'm kind of looking forward to the next one now.

Positive Reinforcement.

I just received this email from my boss. Kinda made my day!