2012: A Review.

Good Morning, Friends.

Tomorrow, I will write my annual post regarding resolutions and other new-year-beginnings.  Today, however, I would like to write about 2012.  I mean, this is the last day of it and all.

Let's see what amazing things occurred in 2012...

• I went in for my yearly physical in January and found out I was a lot more overweight than I thought.  I decided to do something about it and over the course of this year, I have lost 8 pounds!  I tried some new crafting techniques, tried to start a daily writing prompt but couldn't stick to it, started to scare myself about my future children, and found some new music - finally.

• In February, I tried lots of new recipes, quit my job at Intab, bought a new dresser, got tickets to see Wicked for Vday, and started Freakin' Obsessed Friday.

• March was a more wound-down month.  I came to the incredibly unfortunate conclusion that I had lost 6 months' worth of photos.  I still haven't recovered them, by the way.  We found out Durham had a Zaxby's, which thrilled our souls, and it's right next to Goodberry's!  I finally finished The Green Mile.  I learned about taxes, the hard way.  I was also given a sewing machine by my absolutely awesome husband, but the post was never published.  (Well, maybe March wasn't so calm after all!)

• In April, Bonnie revealed how much of a scaredy dog she is.  I painted some pretty shoes for Easter.  We went home for Easter and I got all my hair chopped off.  Although I had heard of Etsy, my love affair with it began here.

• May had the fewest number of posts, with only two.  I started writing about my move to Durham and how hard it was for me to acclimate.  Desperate Housewives ended, and I started watching 30 Rock instead.

• June turned out to be a busy, fun month.  Ray Bradbury died, and the literary world wept.  The Indy Weekly came out with their Best of the Triangle issue and Justin and I made the best of that weekend trying out new things.  KK5 came out and was promptly read.  I told the blogging world about my then-new job.  I discovered Boy Meets World exists in DVD form, and was graciously given the entire series by my sweet hubby.  I participated in my third handmade gift exchange.  I made my first, very little, thing on my new sewing machine.  Justin and I had our first ever commission made by the supremely talented Gabe Dunston.

• The first week of July was my birthday week, and I turned 26 on the 5.  The blog got a face lift.  I found out that sometimes reliving your childhood as an adult isn't a good idea.  I got that old, familiar baby bug - but this time, Justin and I actually discussed it and there may be Lunchables in the near future. :)  I read Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter.  I looked into this neat 5K called Color Me Rad, and started thinking about running it.  Then, after several signs, I decided to do it.

• In August, the date for CMR in Raleigh was finally announced.  I read The Postcard Killers.  It was in August that I started looking for other work.  Still no word on that front.  I suffered a good two-week bout of IBS, and pulled a Cinderella, using new shoes to fix the problem!  Halloween came early, and I couldn't stop thinking about it!

• The Halloween kick continued into September.  I discovered Wordle.  I will make another cloud tonight to encompass an entire year's worth of words.  I was finally able to run again, in crisp autumn air no less, and had a lead for a job that didn't end up panning out.  I discovered Gangnam Style.  I read and re-watched The Time Traveler's Wife.  I left a sweet little goodbye letter for our little apartment, when the times comes for it.

• October was another busy month, clocking in the most posts for the year, with 23.  I tried to do a 31-Day challenge but just couldn't stick with it.  After buying an iPhone in September, I was then on the hunt for a case.  I chose the I-Arc Reactor-You case.  My blog finally reached over 1,000 page views since its installation in September 2009.  I held a Halloween Movie Extravaganza, and started with my favorite, Hocus Pocus.  I finally started seeing results from my running.  This is the only positive reinforcement I received from my boss this year.  I ran the Color Me Rad 5K in Raleigh, and wrote about the little-known details.  I started jotting down ideas for tattoos.  I published a long-forgotten post about accepting Durham as my new home.  Justin and I held an awesome Halloween Party.

• We started November out with Daylight Savings Time.  Justin and I voted in our first presidential election, and Obama won.  For our anniversary, Justin and I went to Asheville, NC to see the Biltmore House at Christmastime.  Still haven't had time to work on those pictures, though.  I wrote up my experience with running in CMR.  Justin and I continued our tradition of not eating turkey the day of Thanksgiving, and had Phil to enjoy the meal with this time.  At the end of the month, I offered some cleaning tips I use myself.

• The Waterfields ended the year by heading down to Spartanburg for Christmas (no post yet), and I participated in my fourth handmade gift exchange.  I was given an ultimatum about my job that I started in May, and there still isn't a lot that is certain on that front.  As a Christmas present to Justin, I started reading The Dresden Files.  I am currently on the second book.

That's a lot of stuff!  Truthfully, when I start writing this post this morning, I wasn't expecting quite that many links.  But it makes me happy to see the year in bullet form. :)  2012 yielded 122 posts, more than 2009, 2010, and 2011 combined!  I hope to see similar numbers next year.

A whole mess of other stuff happened that just never made it into a post.  One of my best friends, Dave, wrote and published a comic called Pizzula.  Along with me turning 26, Justin turned 25.  We went to see Wicked in May.  The gang reunited for our yearly shenanigans at D*Con down in Atlanta, and this time Luke got to come!  My mom started a new job.  My step dad got laid off from his.  Luke and Elyse started dating way back in February.  I got a new Keurig for Christmas and have been loving it.  Those are just some of the things that never got written about.

2012 was a pretty good year.  A lot of good happened, and a lot turmoil got passed around, too.  But I guess that's how it is with every year.  As of midnight tonight, we have officially survived the Mayan apocalypse.  I'll be glad when the year is over.  It seems like December burdened me with a bit of the Scrooges.  I've been in a bad mood almost this entire month.  I'll be glad to turn the new calendar to the first clean page and start over in 2013.  Thirteen is a lucky number for me, and I hope next year will be lucky.

Hope you enjoyed my little recap there.  Happy last day of the year to you!

Partying Like It's 1920

Click to enlarge.

On August 18, 1920, women were officially granted the right to vote.  I'm incredibly thankful to the women who struggled and fought and persevered so that I could be granted that right today.

If you are a woman, and you are able to vote today, please exercise your right.  Even now in 2012 we are not always treated as equals, but we are granted this way to speak our minds and hopefully rally together for a better tomorrow.  We owe it to ourselves and our forewomen to do this today.

Justin and I voted this morning.

We both voted for Obama.  I'm hoping for 4 more years of continued, steady change instead of 4 years of restricted, archaic, chauvinistic repeats.  Time will tell.

This sticker means more than telling other people that you voted.  It means being able to look in the mirror and see it on your shirt, knowing that you have made a difference.  Every vote counts.  Don't belittle your own vote to feel like the algae in the fish tank.  Every one counts.

Please get out and vote today.  This is the future we're talking about here, not stupid Facebook statuses or rehashing the televised debates.  This matters.  Your vote matters.

The 5 Stages of Durham

I just found this!  I wrote this post a little over a year ago, and saved it as draft but never published it.  Figured better late than never.  Here's another dose of my fight with moving to Durham and learning to love it.

Written on 9.20.11:
When I moved in with Justin in January of 2010, I thought Durham was the most amazing place to live, ever.  And in all honesty, it had nothing to do with Durham.  Every bit of it had to do with my love for Justin.  If Justin had gotten a job and moved to Canada, or Timbuktu, I would have thought those were great places to live, too.  But as it turns out, he got a job at Duke and moved to Durham.  January of that year was a very exciting time in my life.  I think it was the second time I have felt that sure about myself.  (The first was graduating from junior college in 2007.)

As of January in 2010 (almost two years ago, wow!), I had just graduated college with a bachelors degree, had gotten engaged and was planning my dream wedding, had just returned from a wedding festival where I won a free honeymoon, and was preparing to move in with the love of my life, away from my parents.  Life seemed so simple, and so easy to do then.  Graduating college?  Check.  Getting married?  Working on it.  Becoming a housewife?  Close!  I mean, I pretty much had no worries.  My student loans wouldn't come into effect for another 6 months, and I was absolutely certain that I would have a job by then.  It seriously didn't even cross my mind that I couldn't get a job, or that it would be difficult.  I wasn't even thinking of applying to work anywhere, because I was taking the first few months "off" from working.  That's how confident I was.

Stuff got hard.

I moved in with Justin, and that was fine.  As can be expected, no matter how long you've been together, when you decide to move in with someone, you learn things about them that maybe you didn't know or didn't want to know, and vice-versa.  We had fights, and there were nights where I cried and wanted nothing more than to move back in with my mom.  But eventually, that feeling passed and our life together began to get a routine.  Because I wasn't working, and because we only had one car, I drove Justin to work every morning, and hung out in the apartment alone.  The furthest I ever went was the grocery store (which I walked to), and to pick Justin up from work.  Then I made dinner, he played WoW and I watched TV (we had satellite then) or surfed the Web.  I usually fell asleep first, on the couch (still do), and when he got tired, he would wake me up and walk me to the bed where we would then go to sleep.  Rinse, repeat.

As those first few months went on, however, I began to develop a very serious, though somewhat minor, depression.  I sat in the apartment all day, watching movies or TV, and talked to my mom on the phone as often as possible, because she worked a day job then, too.  I missed the hell out of my mom, and it upset me that I lived so far away.  I know I could have lived further than 4 hours away, but this was (and is) the farthest I've ever lived from home, and it was hitting me pretty hard.  I missed Spartanburg.  I missed knowing where everything was, and my friends, and the places to eat and the movie theater.  I began longing for Spartanburg.  Durham was suddenly horrible.  It was the worst place on Earth to be, and I couldn't stand it.  I blamed Durham for taking me away from my family and my friends, and things I was familiar with.

The apartment Justin and I lived in suddenly became a drastically different picture than the sunshine-y, bright, loving place it had been when I moved into it.  Our kitchen, and accordingly the other rooms sometimes, had roaches in it.  Bad.  They were everywhere.  They scaled the walls and the floor.  It was absolutely, and on all accounts, disgusting.  We had the apartment sprayed several times, and we even learned that the bug issue had taken over our entire building, so they had to evacuate the building for a day to fumigate it.  Nothing worked.  As pop culture will tell you, those damn things will survive the apocalypse.  This is what depressed me more than anything else, knowing that we were forced to live in a place where the most disgusting creatures on Earth crawled on everything we owned.  I can remember sitting on the couch, staring at the kitchen from the living room and being incredibly petrified to walk in there because I might see one.  I avoided the kitchen as much as possible.  I could just see the episode of Twilight Zone where the man with the roach phobia gets eaten alive by them as they come out of the walls come true in my living room.

I became a recluse, and refused to leave the apartment for any reason other than to go to the grocery store or take and pick up Justin from work.  I kept the blinds closed and became frightened of our ghetto neighborhood.  (When Justin moved in, unbeknownst to him, there was bullet hole in the window of the bedroom.)  Realizing how bad the neighborhood we now had to live in for the next 6 months was, I became even more of a recluse because it scared me to go out into the community of odd and scary people.

And so that was my life from February to June of 2010.  I don't guess that's a terribly long time to be depressed, but having never been depressed, it was long for me.  After June, we moved out of the hellhole apartment and into the much nicer and cleaner and better upgrade of an apartment that we currently live in.  But even after the move, I still didn't like Durham.  I sat in the new apartment, same as before, watching movies or TV, and not doing anything.  Not being able to find work really weighed on me as well because I felt like I wasn't contributing.

Durham became my go-to for resting blame on.  Everything bad that happened was because we lived in Durham.

Then came July of 2011.

My mother came to visit us for a week, and while she was here, she and I rode around the downtown area a lot, a part of Durham I didn't have a lot of experience with.  That week really opened my eyes to Durham, and helped me see things I could love about it.

Downtown Durham changed everything.  I had a can't-beat-'em-join-'em epiphany.

Durham doesn't necessarily rule over Spartanburg, but now I can call both places home and feel all right about it.

I feel like I've gone through the Kübler-Ross equivalent of Durham.

• Denial.  It's not so bad living here, it could be worse!
• Anger.  Dammit, Durham, you suck!  I want to go home!
• Bargaining.  Okay, if I can go home every two weeks, maybe I can stand Durham more.  Small doses.
• Depression.  I wish I didn't have to live here.  I'd rather live anywhere but here.
• Acceptance.  Well, this isn't so bad.  I can love both home towns equally.

---

Written 10.30.12:
Looking back on all this, it makes me so sad to think back on those few months I was so depressed.
  Even now, I'll admit I don't really get out as much as I should, but I'm in no way as much of a hermit as I was then.  I'm no longer afraid.  I get out in the morning or afternoons and run now.  Justin and I go on adventures together to see the little spots of Durham we haven't seen yet.  I've accepted this town as where I live; it's not weird anymore to put 27705 as my zip code and not 29301.  I've almost completely acclimated.  Some things about Durham still give me the creeps, though.  The homeless population here is the worst I've ever seen.  They're also pushy!  The parts of Durham (and Raleigh, for that matter) that are ghetto, are really ghetto.  They're scary.  I also still miss Spartanburg like crazy sometimes.  I get excited to go home and visit my friends and see the familiar places that made up home for me for 23 years.  But I like coming back to Durham now, too.  Durham is the familiar place for me now.  It's so weird the turn my hatred for Durham has taken over the last two (almost three!) years.  And all it took was that one weekend from my mother to change everything.  But then again, she always fixes everything. :)

Home, Sweet Home

When I first moved in with Justin back in 2010, we lived in a small one-bedroom apartment (not unlike the one we live in now).  I had pipe dreams of us living in a house, but those quickly vanished.  Even now, we aren't looking to be homeowners for another couple of years.  We have lived in the same apartment complex since May of 2010.  It's been cozy and we have created this little 650-square-foot living space that is all our own.  It is full of our pictures, our purchased artwork, our bookshelves, and our gadgets.  It's our home.

Here is an outline of our apartment, taken straight from the website.

As you can see, all the rooms are represented, but it's a tight little living space.

When we lived in our first apartment and were looking to move, Justin suggested these apartments that he would pass on the way to work every morning.  They were owned by Ticon Properties (the same people we now live under).  The apartments Justin passed were actually 2-bedroom units, and when we found out the price, we knew our then-income wouldn't cover it.  This talk with the office manager led us to where we now live.

I wanted to write this post because even though I am always thinking of the future and what I'd do to A, B, and C if we had a bigger place, I've really enjoyed living here.  I was catching up on my blogs this morning, and read this post on Everyday Elsie.  She talks about upgrading to a new studio, but at the end of the post she reminisces about her time spent in the current one.  This got me thinking about my apartment.  It's come such a long way from the way it was decorated when we first moved here.  Some things have remained the same, but not much.

I think of all the little parties we've had here, all the gallons of tea and Key Lime pies that have filled the fridge, how the smell of pot roast and Falling Leaves and Spice has permeated our home and welcomed us so many times as we walk through the door.  The many decorations and the dishes that have been washed.  I think of the nicks in the walls from where we moved furniture around, about hauling both mattress sets up the stairs, and seeing the Chapel from our dining room window.  I have so many wonderful memories of this little place, and I'm sure I'll get really sentimental when we finally do move onto bigger things.  This was where Justin carried me over the threshold after we got married.  We ended and began our new life as a couple here.  Many recipes have been tried, failed, and succeeded in this kitchen.  The bathroom has had the exact same decor since we moved in, and Justin has always gotten playful flack from his buddies for it.  I've performed many life-saving feats on clothes otherwise thought dead in our little laundry nook.  The bedroom, I'll admit, is still a work in progress, but someday it'll get where I want it to be.

I just wanted to tell you, Little One-Bedroom Apartment, that even though you may feel like I'm eagerly awaiting moving day for a bigger place (I'd be lying if I said I wasn't), you've made our lives so wonderful and so welcoming.  You've protected us from rain and snow, and given us a great view for people-watching.  Thanks for always being here for us when we come back from errands or work.  And thanks for putting up with Bonnie; she really likes you, too.  I only hope that when we do leave, we can leave you better than we found you, and just as welcoming for whoever gets to live here next.

*misty eyes*

Whew.  Okay, well now that my little not-really-goodbye letter to my apartment is over, I also wanted to take this time to show you where I want to move to!  My goal had always been the two-bedrooms we first came upon that I mentioned earlier.  I remember the day we were shown the inside, and Justin and I just kept looking at each other in awe and mouthing, "Oh, my God!" to one another.  It was perfect.  It was like a little house, but not a house.  It's absolute perfect middle ground for us.  These units were called Glenbrook West.

This is the outline of GW, where I wanted to live for so long.

And now, after dreaming of GW for a little over 2 years, I've had another thought.

Ticon owns property all over Durham, and our complex is really convenient to lots of things: restaurants, downtown, Duke, at least three different interstates, fast food, etc.  GW is about 15 minutes from where we live.  Another unit, exactly the same as GW, called Lenox East, is located about 3 minutes from where we live.  It's just down the street.  Justin and I really like living on "this side" of town, and we wouldn't have to take the interstate to move if we decided to live in LE instead.  I think a lot of good could come from deciding on LE.  The outside of the building isn't as pretty as GW, but it's the inside that counts, right? :)

This is the outline of LE, exactly the same as GW, but cheaper!

I'm just excited to be thinking of the future, the attainable future at that; particularly a future that is so close in proximity to right now!  Plus, I'll be glad to have a record of this when we do move and I can confirm or sadly deny what actually ended up happening and where we ended up moving to.

On the Hunt

Over the last week, I've been looking into getting another job.  Even though I'm happy with my current job (to a degree), and I'm thankful for the one(s) I have, I would still like a better one.

This is hard for me to admit, because my mom and Justin, specifically, both think I can do anything.  This is awesome for my ego, but not for applying for a job.  My mom (and Justin, sometimes) talks me up to everyone and sometimes I feel very pressured by this.  My mom, like many other moms, thinks that because I can make blogs/websites and can make videos using iMovie on the computer that I am a computer whiz.  Then when she has a question about the inner-workings of her computer or the Internet, delving into stuff like C++, she doesn't understand why I don't automatically know the answer.  The mediums I work with and the mediums my mother thinks I am the master of are so radically different.  To her, it's all just "computer."  It's almost like thinking that a child who has mastered Checkers should somehow automatically know how to play Chess because the board looks the same.  So, when a potential employer asks my mom if I know how to do "blank," if it has to do with computers in any way, my mom starts singing my praises.  Then when they get to me and I either have no clue what aspect of computers they're talking about, or have zero experience in that part of the field, I am left in the dust.  Justin does the same thing.

This is not to say I am not grateful for their efforts.  The fact that the two most important people in my life think I am capable of pretty much anything is both flattering and humbling.  Sadly, it's also wrong. :)

I said all that to say this: because I am so often put up against jobs I am in no way suited for, I tend to have a low view of myself in terms of what I can do.  I always see what I can't do and that can end up weighing heavily on me.  I look through countless job postings on numerous websites and all I ever see is what I can't do or what I'm not capable of.

Well, I'm sick of that.

So this morning, I went to LinkedIn (ironically, to get a better idea of my current job description) and searched.  I found a Copywriter job with a company called Capstrat in Raleigh.  Capstrat is "One of the largest communications firms in the Southeast and one of the top 40 agencies in the United States.  Capstrat is a full-service strategic communications firm, providing these services in-house:"

Taken directly from the website.

Their About page is one of the funniest/coolest ones I've ever seen.  They just seem like a cool company and I'd love to work for them.  I applied to the Copywriter position and am hoping for the best.  The company is also in Raleigh, but it's only about 25 minutes from the apartment, as opposed to 40!

This is all exciting for me because I finally feel like I am deserving of something job-related.  Usually, I am so quick to just say, "They'd never hire me," and don't even try.  But this morning I just felt different.  I felt deserving and I felt cool.  I didn't care what the job description said (even though I could do this job pretty easily...it is pretty much what I went to school for), I just wanted to try.  So, I did.  Here's hoping it paid off!

The Creative Process

(a.k.a., a post with a lot of pictures in it.)

Back in May, Justin and I went with our friend Dave to Free Comic Book Day at one of our local comic book stores.  Gabe Dunston, a friend of Dave's as well as an illustrator, drew a commission for us.  He drew Justin and me as Zelda and Link.  It took him about two hours to do.  He is 100% color blind, and has to ask which color is which while drawing/coloring his art.  So while the guys walked around and actually got free comics, I hung out with Gabe and helped him pick out colors.  It was fascinating to me to watch him work, since I can't draw to save my life.  Here is his creative process.

I still can't believe it started from just a blank sheet of paper.

It now sits in our living room, next to our computer table.  We love that Zelda has brown hair and Link has a red beard, like the two of us.  I'd never had a commission done before at a convention-type thing, and didn't even know they existed, but I'm excited to have another done in the future!

Indy Week-End

The Independent Weekly released their annual Best of the Triangle last week.

In case you are not familiar with BTT, it is a compilation of the best everything in the Triangle, as voted by readers.  Generally, BTT is greatly anticipated every year.

After we found out BTT was out, Justin and I decided to make this past weekend a try-new-things affair, as well as enjoying some current favorites of Durham.

For lunch on Saturday, we ate at Only Burger.  I'm sad to tell you that I didn't take one picture of our food or the restaurant.  But rest assured, it was good!  They are a little pricey for my taste, but if you want a super-good quality burger, this is certainly the place for it.  I will say, also, that I prefer them over Five Guys.

After lunch, I talked Justin into a Loco Pop, and we even picked up a Pup Pop for Bonnie!

We hung out at home the rest of the afternoon, while I read KK5 and Justin played either Rift or Diablo on the computer.

After looking through the Indy Weekly for another idea, we saw that Lilly's Pizza was opening their Durham location last week!  And so, that was dinner for us.

We ordered the Super Duper pizza and split it.  It was basically another variation of a Meat Lover's Pizza, but all the meats were so good, especially the sausage!  The prices weren't too high, either, considering the competition like Randy's.  But, as a word of caution, go for dinner or lunch at off-peak times.  It took almost an hour for us to get our pizza.  Don't get me wrong, it was a Saturday night during the maiden voyage in Durham.  I understand them getting the kinks out, but just make sure to keep that in mind if you decide to go when it's busy.



The Super Duper at Lilly's Pizza

The Durham branch of Lilly's is right next to Morgan Imports, which is one of my favorite stores in Durham that I never have money to shop in.

 

They make pointy-toed rain boots now.  Huh.

This is the bike I'm going to buy in the near future.  I've wanted it for SO long, and only $100?  Heck yeah!

Right across the street from Morgan Imports in Brightleaf Square, which is quaint and awesome, so we took a quick stroll through there.

The sun began to set on the way back to the car, and it made for a lovely picture.

We saw this bumper sticker in Offbeat Music, and love it because we totally agree with it!

But after all the fun was had at Brightleaf, we got our Loco Pop on one more time.  But since the afternoon, the A/C had died and it was over 80 degrees inside!  At least the ice cream didn't melt.

So, that was our short new-Durham-stuff weekend.  But we own the copy of Indy Weekly with the BTT 2012 in it, and now it's online, so we will definitely be checking out new stuff again soon!

In the meantime, I leave you with this video of my sweet Bonnie eating her Pup Pop.  It's adorable.